It must be Patti’s time of the month this week. Clearly, she’s a little pissed at me. I guess her point is that I’ve already put the family through so much shit, why should I suggest that her father was somehow less than ethical. Something about at least our little ones could have someone to look up to. Hah, if it wasn’t for my good guidance they’d be picketing to raise taxes and privatize health care.
Anyway, back to my performance. As soon as Patti quits flowin’ this week she’ll see the light. She’ll probably regret that she didn’t come on The View with me. Oh shit, she’s back again. She’s saying, for the sake of our family, I need to end this right now. Figure out a way to stop the impeachment trial. Otherwise, her and her father are going to spread a rumor that I wear a rug. Totally not true. But look, I can’t risk that kind of bad publicity. What politician could? I promised her I’d think about it. Off to think . . .
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